Thursday, January 4, 2024

Part 2 of an #Interview with Camille Cates, Author of Moving Forward After Abortion

 

Part 2 of an Interview with
Camille Cates, Author of
Moving Forward After Abortion

Moving Forward after Abortion by Camille Cates is an important book for churches to make available for every member to read. By reading this book, Christians will be better informed and equipped to talk about abortion and aftercare both inside and outside of the church. The stigma and stereotypes surrounding abortion may keep women from buying the book for themselves, but by having books available in churches, more women in need will be able to access this important resource. Men who were the father of an aborted baby will also find help from the biblical truths presented.

 

Q: Why do you encourage churches to make Moving Forward after Abortion available for every member to read? 

 

There are two reasons I recommend churches to make this book available to every single individual or household in their church. 

 

First, women and men who have experienced an abortion aren’t very likely to pick this resource up on their own. If it is made available in the church’s resource center, they may be fearful of what others think if they are seen picking up this book. Also, they may not purchase it online for fear of a spouse or family member seeing it in their online cart, or in the mail. Making it available to attendees on Sanctity of Life Sunday with encouragement from the pulpit for everyone to read it automatically gives anonymity to someone in the congregation who is post-abortive and fearful of purchasing this book on their own. If ushers are handing out copies to each household unit as they leave and many people have it in their hands, then they won’t feel as exposed. Churches can also make free copies available in the women’s or men’s restrooms where people could grab a copy inconspicuously. 

 

Secondly, the overturning of Roe v. Wade was huge. Many Christians wrongly assume that the abortion battle is over, but it’s just beginning. In the political realm, and with an upcoming presidential election on the horizon, abortion has already been stated as a hot-button topic that the candidates will be speaking on. This always creates a flurry of conversation among Christians. Unfortunately, well-meaning Christians speaking on this issue can wound individuals with careless words in their conversations with others, be it in the church hallway or in their small group or Sunday School class. This book will inform and equip believers to have compassion for the people who have been impacted by abortion or are contemplating an abortion. I believe Christians will be better equipped to truly speak the truth in love after reading these resources.

 

Q: Do you have any advice for being a good listener and friend to a woman who needs to share her abortion story?

 

I think the best thing a friend can do when listening to someone share about their abortion experience is to be sensitive and careful in your responses. As with many life situations, even if you have had something similar happen, it is best to avoid saying things like, “I know how you must feel,” or even, “You don’t have to feel bad about that—God forgives you.” One of the best things you can do to help someone share is to tell them, “Thank you for entrusting me with something so personal. I will be praying for you as you heal and move forward with the Lord. I’m here for you if you need anything in this journey with God. Is it ok to check in with you and see how you’re doing? You can reach out to me any time.” Ask her if you can pray over her. In your prayer ask God to supply everything she needs from Him during this time. Keep it simple and unassuming.

 

Q: What are some of the many emotions women experience following an abortion? Why are these feelings so difficult to process and overcome?

 

Probably the two most common emotions after an abortion are guilt and grief, and those feelings may be at the root of many others. It is important to deal with both guilt and grief biblically. Guilt runs deep as we feel shame over sin. As Adam and Eve did in Genesis 3, we can try to cover over our guilt and shame instead of acknowledging our sin to the Lord and receiving forgiveness and cleansing. 

 

Grief is tricky because we do need to feel it and process it biblically due to our sin against God and our aborted children, but we run the risk of remaining stuck in it instead of moving forward clothed in Christ’s grace and mercy. Many women and men also grieve their babies, but they may be doing this with worldly sorrow instead of godly sorrow that leads to repentance. 

 

Another emotion that is common is anger. This can be difficult to process because we don’t understand why we are angry and often neglect to relate our anger to a previous abortion. It’s important to understand the difference between righteous and unrighteous anger as well. The book walks the reader through these two different forms of anger. 

 

Anxiety and depression are also very common. Anxiety can be difficult to overcome if you haven’t biblically addressed your abortion and are living under the constant fear of others finding out about it. Our culture is constantly discussing abortion in the public sphere, so every time the topic comes us, anxiety can shoot up in the heart of a person who has experienced abortion. Depression is a prolonged sadness and is most likely tied back to guilt and/or grief. If we haven’t grieved biblically, it’s as if that emotion has no place to go. We’re not bringing it before the Lord, so it just lingers in the heart and in the back of our minds, perpetuating depression. 

 

Q: How can confessing your abortion as a sin be healing? What underlying sin is the common motivation to having an abortion?

 

Refusing to humble ourselves and confess our abortions as sin can leave women and men stuck spiritually. Marriage is a great example of how a relationship is negatively impacted when one person has sinned against the other and refuses to acknowledge it. The one who was hurt and offended can’t move forward in the relationship because there is no reconciliation.

 

Sadly, I think when we sin, we are hesitant to come before God and be honest because we are either prideful or fearful. There are so many places in Scripture where it assures us that confession brings cleansing and healing.

 

  • 1 John 1:9 says, If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”
  • James 5:16 tells us, “Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.”

Q:  If you could tell a woman starting her journey of moving forward just one thing, what would it be?

 

Trust God in this process. It can be overwhelming and there is a huge temptation to fear about what is going to transpire on this journey (i.e., what is going to come to the surface emotionally). God loves you and wants you to be healed through his Word so that you can walk with him unhindered.

 

Find a trusted friend or pastor and tell them that you have had an abortion. Ask them to pray for you as you are working through things and let them know you may reach out for encouragement and prayer as you are on this journey. 

Moving Forward after Abortion: Finding Comfort in God

Ask the Christian Counselor Series

By Camille Cates

September 5, 2023 / Retail Price: $11.99

Print ISBN: 978-1-64507-312-3

RELIGION/Christian Ministry/Counseling & Recovery

Click here for the full interview.

Read a Preview

About the Author

Camille Cates is a biblical counselor and a public speaker with a passion for ministering to women in crisis. She has written and spoken extensively on the topics of pregnancy care ministry, post-abortion trauma counseling, sexual abuse, and God’s design for sex and sexuality. 

 

She is the author of Moving Forward after Abortion and the minibook Pregnancy Crisis: This Wasn’t the Plan

 

Cates and her husband, Troy, have three adult children and reside in the metro Cincinnati, OH area. 

 

Learn more about Camille Cates and her story at www.agrittygospellife.com. You can also find her on Facebook (A Gritty Gospel Life) and Instagram (@agrittygospellife).







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