Coffee Dregs and Being Intentional by Julie Arduini

Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.

And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. Colossians 3:12-14, NIV

 

I’ve blogged about this concept early in my blogging life, but the topic came back to mind when I went to make coffee and realized my husband already had. I looked inside the pot and knew he guessed the amount of coffee to put in. As he’d confessed before, he guessed the amount and is usually off on the measurement. This time he went over, and coffee dregs commandeered the pot.

And there was the gentle nudge from God. Who loves to drink dregs?

Not me.

I love my mocha, and savor my morning coffee. But when there’s dregs at the bottom and I’m not paying attention, I spit it out. I want the whipped cream! The warm, smooth taste that slides down my throat. Not the bits that have no place in my drink.

Yet, the visual is a good one for marriage and family.

They deserve the whipped cream experience. Our words, our focus, our time should be top-notch quality for them.  I wish I could tell you I deliver them a hot cup of my best intentions and love, but I don’t. If I’m editing, I absently nod as a child shares tidbits about their day. I’m usually tired after dinner. If my husband or kids want to discuss schedules or just engage, I’m not always on board. Sometimes I even rebuff them with a plea for peace.

I realized with that visual, I’m basically handing my loved ones a cup of coffee dregs.

It’s not pretty to think about, but it sums my attitude and actions up much of the time. I give so much to everyone else that I take those the closest to me for granted. Instead of creating an atmosphere that says I care, like when the barista creates a fancy picture with my mocha, I insist they swallow a thermos of dregs.

The thought is enough for me to be intentional. Stop what I’m doing and look my loved ones in the eye as they speak. Ask questions to keep the discussion going. Off answers that are more detailed and involved than “uh huh.” I need to seek them out to hear about their day, their praises and frustrations.

It’s a reality I don’t want to think about but the kids are growing up. One day I’m going to sit down and want to share a cup of joe with my children via quality time and realize their cups aren’t just empty, they are gone. I don’t want to send them off to their adult lives with mutual regrets. I don’t want to face the empty nest with a husband that thinks I’m a stranger.

How about you? Has the image of dregs in the coffeepot challenged you to be more intentional with your family?

 

Julie Arduini loves to encourage readers to find freedom in Christ by surrendering the good, the bad, and ---maybe one day---the chocolate. She’s the author of the contemporary romance series SURRENDERING TIME, (Entrusted, Entangled, Engaged,) as well as the stand-alone novellas, MATCH MADE IN HEAVEN and RESTORING CHRISTMAS. She also shares her story in the infertility devotional, A WALK IN THE VALLEY. Her other latest release, YOU’RE BRILLIANT, is for girls ages 10-100, written with her teenaged daughter, Hannah, and is book 3 in their SURRENDERING STINKIN’ THINKIN’ series. She blogs every other Wednesday for Christians Read, as well as monthly with Inspy Romance. She resides in Ohio with her husband and two children. Learn more by visiting her at http://juliearduini.com, where she invites readers to opt in to her content full of resources and giveaway opportunities.

 

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 Amazing things happen when a group of high school students and women discover they are more than competent.

Bethany’s not excited to start high school in a new community where she doesn’t know anyone. She quickly befriends KJ, a popular sophomore, and it looks like the transition will go well until Bethany discovers KJ’s boyfriend is a bully. With a strong sense of justice, Bethany challenges Brent Sullivan, and he’s determined to make her suffer.

Cheri takes on an additional job in a school to help pay for Sabrina’s wedding. It’s a different atmosphere than at the church where she feels more comfortable as the pastor’s wife and mentor with the Linked ministry. After several mishaps, Cheri feels like she’s found an assignment where she can make a difference until a teacher belittles her work.

Can Bethany and Cheri resist the lies about their competency and hold on to the fact they’re brilliant?

The final book in the Surrendering Stinkin’ Thinkin’ series for tweens, teens, and women of all ages by mother and daughter authors Julie Arduini and Hannah Arduini.

 

You’re Brilliant: https://amazon.com/Youre-Brilliant-Surrendering-Stinkin-Thinkin-ebook/dp/B0874Y5B4C/