Sometimes, the verse I cling to most in the Bible is Luke
2:2a. “And it came to pass…”
In January 2015, we went through a situation with our oldest
son. We didn’t know how it’s going to end. We still aren’t sure what really
happened. Unfortunately, he has lied to us so much that we can’t trust him,
even when we want to. As a result of working on “Black Friday” that year, he
was accused of something. A felony. He denies it. There is a video that says he
might have but doesn’t really prove anything. It falls more into the category
of he says/she says. The questions are: “Did it really happen?” and “If so, was
it an accident or on purpose?” A judge had to decide both things. If it
happened, and if it was determined to be deliberate, the ramifications would ruin
his life. It ended with him owing a massive fine – which he has defaulted in
paying. A warrant is out for his arrest.
We’re still parents even when our adult children behave
badly. We suffer and worry when “life happens” to our husband or wife. I
remember a Christian agent telling a story about one time her husband rode on
an elevator with a woman. He was an administrator in a hospital. The woman said
that he sexually harassed her. He was a Christian, denied it vehemently, but he
ended up losing his job. Guilty—even though he was innocent.
Almost the same thing happened with my husband. He worked in
a nursing home and was told “Make sure the residents do everything they can for
themselves.” Specifically, one lady, who was supposed to put on her own shoes.
His boss told him, “Do not put her
shoes on for her.” So he goes in to help her. She says “Put my shoes on.” He
tells her that he isn’t allowed to. The woman responds, “If you don’t, I will
tell administration that you abused me.” My husband chose to obey his boss and
not the woman. And as a result, he was accused of abuse. Fired from his job.
And ultimately, kicked out of nursing school even though the state decided he
was innocent. Guilty—even though he was innocent.
When things like that happen in our lives, it’s difficult to
keep our focus. On God. On our jobs. On the
rest of the family. Especially if you’re
an artist or an author and your creativity is highly dependant on minimal
stress . . . or an abundance of grace to carry you through.
You have to remind yourself, often out loud, “Breathe! This too shall pass.” The good, and the bad, and even the ugly –
they will all come to pass. But the one
constant in your life will always be there. God.
When bad things happen you have to move on. Sometimes,
moving on isn’t exactly what we imagine it will be. Sometimes it’s just getting
to a place where we’re okay with the future, whatever it holds.
Moving on isn’t always about making drastic changes. Moving
on sometimes means being sure of who you are. That way you know that whatever
the future holds, you’ll be okay.
With the case of my son, I have to be okay with whatever the
future holds. My plans for my life (or my hopes for his life) doesn’t always
equate to being God’s plan for my life (or God’s plan for his life). I have to
be willing to take God’s hand and let Him lead me into the unknown.
I can only see a few feet in front of me. God can see the
big picture. I need to hold on to that knowledge, even when it doesn’t feel
true. Even when I desperately want to take things into my own hands.
And it came to pass…
Sometimes, waiting is all you can do. There’s no other
choice but to hold tight until things calm down.
If the setbacks in my life hadn’t happened, I probably
would’ve never been here on this site as a blogger. I wouldn’t have learned to
trust God with my life, to give Him total control of the characters in my head.
I wouldn’t have a clear plan for my future.
I still don’t have all the answers—not by a long shot. But I
know that God uses our greatest pain to form the most effective launching pads
for our lives.
This too shall pass.
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